Strap or ship out by Puneet Rajhans

Strap or ship out
As i am told to wait for my turn at the 4th floor of AIIMS for suspected dengue, i am swayed by a board hanging to a wall that simply won't let you wash dirty linen in public. My gaze is fixed to the eight steps to wash and rub hands and how it could be done with clinical precision. High on its content are interfaced, interlocked, palms, dorsum and fingers, enough to let you think you were clever enough to sidestep them for years together. I am trying to memorise those steps as the sister walks past me now and then. She brings a new patient every time the other one goes inside for clinical interrogation. The last lap of this rigmarole has not been discovered yet. As moments pass, i vacate the chair every time an elderly walks in. How elderly he or she is or the frail looks just meant to get the seat they aspire for during a wait that could turn minutes into hrs. A young girl comes in and sits next to me; her gaze fixed towards mine and mine towards the eight-step board. I can't let anyone cry foul that this lad had enough time to memorise those eight steps and yet he gave it a miss. It is more than one hr and all those who came before and after me have had their interrogation sessions with the doc. Probably the doc inside wants to carry out a more detailed investigation on me. So he is looking for that extra time when chips are down and patients are none. THen i see a man sporting a strap round his neck with a cell in his front pocket. The strap has AIIMS written all over it. i ask the same familiar question of him being from AIIMS. THe man is in no mood to oblige and my gaze again turns towards the board. Why he was not obliging? Perhaps he had better things to do than gaze at the board and learn and unlearn the steps to wash and rub hands.
Probably by now others who are keeping a watch on me are of the view that i would have rehearsed the board lines so well that it would be at the back of my mind. But now my focus shifts to other straps doing the rounds of the city, having spotted the AIIMS one. If this guy could have the AIIMS strap, there could be one inscribed with Delhi police enough to send shivers down the spine of city residents. A strap proclaiming the Police of India would be feared by the place he/she visits. Perhaps a strap on Tihar Jail would be equally feared.
THese straps give them enough power to strip anyone in full public glare . What could stop them in their tracks could be the spotting of someone with media/press strap in the vicinity. THese straps not only tell you about the identity of the person wearing them but also the prime positioning he/she has. Mind you, these straps have the power to displace the UID scheme of Nilekeni as it would be a more prominent identity marker with less budget outlay.

As for the souls like us we could have straps announcing our aam admi lineage. But most of these straps are meant for those having cell possession or an identity in the society that would be feared by others. How could you have a strap round your neck if your distaste for a cell is as strong as your desire to hold no office of profit or loss in the society!
Post clinical interrogation i am told to not make another outing another season unless i strap with my status in society. And this gives me more fodder to strap around. Straps are meant to store vital details about the man on the move.
In all discourses, discussions/events, the invitees have a strap round the neck revealing the identity of the person. How about Obama with a strap clearly defining his identity and landing in Timbuktu. A strap or no strap the host would be least interested in showing allegiance to a man who hasn't cared to mention about Timbuktu in his less-than-preserved Press Briefings. Perhaps a strap for a woman whom he wants to woo in Timbuktu would give him a fair chance to have a Timbuktu tryst.
As for his tryst with Pakistan, he needs to strap himself with all the message on goodies of Pak. A name here and there of charming faces of Pak would cheer the host and he could well be in the company of Kayani,Gilani and Zardari with a night jiski subah nahi
As for likes of us who don't want to reveal and reverberate? Chances are if you don't strap enough you would be stripped to be left with nothing to reveal.